my Grandma & Grandpa Hicken at Maeci's baptism, Feb 2009
I remember being married(vaguely-weird how that happens). I remember that it was not good. I remember keeping so much to myself, not sharing my feelings and fears of my future with even my mom, until I basically exploded. Turns out, I’m pretty good at hiding things. It might even be a talent.
blah, blah, de blah.
Anyway, all of my feelings and fears are for another post(or a book). What I really feel like writing about is my hope and faith in marriage. Guess what everybody? I still want to be married someday!
Why? I know a lot of people that have been married before, and after that went to hell in a handbasket(sorry mom, i love that phrase!), they have sworn it off forever like the plague!
I will tell you why. It’s because of all of the wonderful examples of happy marriages in my life, and I have seen the joy and fulfillment these people experience through being married. They all have issues and struggles, I’m sure. But you can tell a lot about a couple by the way they treat each other in front of other people-friends, family. I’ve paid attention. I’m watching YOU!
The first couples that come to my mind are my Grandma & Grandpa Hicken, and my own amazing parents. I have seen both couples have “discussions”(mom always said, “we’re not fighting, we’re having a discussion”) or disagreements, and the way they treat each other during these times of stress is when the true colors of marriage really shine! My grandpa uses his sense of humor to diffuse situations, and my dad... well my dad is the most patient man I know, and it takes quite a bit to get him riled up... Side note 1: I just realized that it is the men in both of the marriages keeping it easy... us women have a lot more hormones to sort out!
Along with my grandparents & parents, I also look to all of my seriously awesome aunts, uncles and friends to observe their marriages and learn some little lessons I may have missed out on the first go around. Side note 2: my stomach is being so loud right now... must have been the Chinese. I am so happy I’m not sitting in class. Or church...
Anyway, THANK YOU, all my married examples, for helping me keep my faith in marriage. I know that it can be a wonderful blessing in life, and doesn’t have to be filled with fear, anger, and hurtful words. Instead it can be filled with encouragement, kindness and laughter.
I simply cannot end the post without also stating that a large portion of my faith in marriage remains with my Heavenly Father and his plan for me. A favorite quote pops into my head frequently:
“Come what may, and love it”-Joseph B. Wirthlin"That which is for you, will not pass you by"-unknown
I promise I don’t write things about my past experience with marriage for pity, but rather for what it is-something that I have experienced, learning from that and also trying to organize my feelings about it so that I may look to the future with my hope & faith secure!
Thanks for reading my random thoughts...